Day Three Letters

The vanilla letter is to my parents. The genesis of this letter writing project is here. It will take some time for me to write the vanilla letter and I probably need to write that with a clear head as it is way past midnight in Gemmaland. So here is a story about the first time I discovered a kink.

i think i can recall back to being about nine years old when i learned about submission. i know that makes me a really precocious little girl but so be it. There was a girl who used to work for my family. She came from a poor family so they sent her over to our house to clean our dishes, wash our clothes, and serve our food, simple chores which i am sure violated a series of child labor laws somewhere as she was in her early teens. Anyway i can't even remember her name anymore. Let's call her Rita. Rita had an earthy smell on her body, she was very dark skinned, had dark eyes, and shoulder length dark hair. Her skin was smooth, kinda silky, had little to no hair and she had bright white teeth. 

One afternoon after lunch we were lying down together giggling and talking. The idea was to take a nap before Rita had to start her afternoon chores. Well Rita clearly had other things in mind. She started to tickle me. I was laughing at her tickling but there was something different about the way she was tickling me. It was as if she was enjoying the effect she had on me where i was both in pain, laughing, and begging her to stop. The more i begged her to stop, the more she carried on, like she was feeding off of my pain. Then, suddenly Rita climbed over me, pinned my arms down, straddled on top of me and started to grind her pubic region against mine. 

i was stunned. i didn't know what was happening with her, with my body, her body and i tried to struggle and ask her, "What are you doing? Stop now."I had a pleading tone to my voice.

With a cold stare, Rita locked her eyes with mine and said with a stern voice, "Shut up. I am giving you something i want. Just stop struggling." Rita was putting more pressure on my wrists to pin me down as she rubbed herself on top of me over and over again.

i didn't know what was happening to me or to my body at the time except the more Rita pushed herself in between my legs the more warm i felt down there and the more i wanted her to push me. i knew what we were doing was wrong and if someone found out we would be in trouble. That made things scary and somewhat exciting simultaneously except i was not sure it was excitement i felt or if i was just shocked at Rita's boldness. 

Rita never touched me after that afternoon and i longed for her to touch me every day. Months went by but we never spoke of that one incident. Something changed in me that afternoon. Eventually Rita stopped working for us. I got this feeling she was torturing me knowing that I would want her to pin me down again, force herself on me, rubbing on me, making me get wet, and making me feel things i didn't know how to process. That, i think, is my first memory of discovering one of my kinks.